how should I feel, when my family has not come in visit me for almost 10yrs.now.?
Up to 10yrs. ago, I have lived independently, and was able to to do lot of things on my own. I was very active, motivated, always out and about with all my friends. I have, lived on my own for almost 20 yrs. now. I guess, I should explain, that I'm physically disable since infant. I wore, leg braces and using crutches to get around. I also should explain, that I have 17 siblings plus me. I did lot 4-6 hrs. long a distance of driving going back and forth, to see my family and friends, until I couldn't or had anymore strength left in me. In ten yrs. I've had 5 surgery's (total 18) due polio, all my walking, transferring, using manual wheelchair, which have affected my uper body and shoulders & strength get around. With Dr.s order, I'm not allow to walk anymore and started to use electric wheelchair to get around. I lost lot of my Independence, going places with my friends. Because, my electric chair weights 300 lb., that it won't fit in to any ones vehicles. Anyway, in 10 yrs. no one in my family or friends have come visited me. Even, on holidays, my birthdays. I've try and try for them to come here. I even, offer to pay for the gas, hotel, or whatever they need. No one, in the family even called me, sent e-mail, or write. I did all of that, but no respond. Different excuses, every time I try. I'm diagnose of illness of depression. I've also have attempted to kill myself, because of them. The latest one was three yrs. ago. I went in ambulance to ER and had my stomach pumped. Stayed, in hospital for 4 weeks. Every time, I've been to hospital for my depression, no one even came and visit. Not even, my mom. I've promised, to all my dr's, counselors, and Psychosis, that I will not do that again. I do see my counselor once a week. But, sometime that's not even enough. I just don't know, how and what to do for them to come see me. Any advice, would appreciated.